While sifting through my pile of three day old mail I came across not one but TWO rejection letters, including one for a job I was remarkably overqualified for.
Do I have at least an AA? Yes.
Do I have any experience with a college setting? I guess those last six years have sort of counted.
Do I have an understanding of how financial aid works? I know I'll be paying it back forever despite the fact that I'll never have a job that pays me enough to cover said loans.

What gets me is the fact that I didn't even get interviews. How can you possibly deny me based on what is written on a single sheet and a bullshitted cover letter?

And this was after spending hours with Mom discussing flowers and insisting that nothing at my wedding will be made of balloon shapes. Especially not a giant balloon bride and groom.

But there were some high points today. Girly high points. This morning I put on my super cleavage bra, crinoline, new hideous Payless shoes that are not open-toed, and with much struggle, by wedding dress. After lacing up the back of the dress a la nineteenth century corset, I saw what looked like a size 4 in the mirror (still with fat underarms because the sleeveless dress doesn't do anything to camoflage those babies). Later we splurged on manicures at the mall--her treat. And then I went home with perfectly poslished pink nails to open rejection letters. But they can all suck it cuz someday I'll make millions and tomorrow I'm going to Orlando though the money will soon run out...

Coming attractions:
Panko and I decide to whore ourselves out when the last of our stipends dissapate. I'm still deciding between crackwhore and porn star. I'll be holding auditions for pimp and fluffer/key light. This will have to be a double duty until I get some revenue.